Sexy SUV

by Marc Schulhof

Like many of BMW’s most potent creations, the all-new 2011 BMW X5 M wears a cloak of relative anonymity. To the casual eye it looks like any other X5. In other words, powerful, luxurious, staid.

But to those who notice this sort of thing, the X5 M’s tires make an altogether different first impression.

Gobsmackingly wide and seemingly as thin as rubber bands around the X5 M’s 20-inch alloy wheels, these are the tires of a drag strip superstar—not an SUV that will ever see duty on anything more threatening than a patch of gravel.

That is what the X5 M is all about: an SUV by classification, but a sports car by design. It boasts on-road performance to rival many of the hottest coupes and sedans on the market.

For those who overlook the X5 M’s tires and miss the significance of its quad-exhaust pipes, a few extremely discreet “M” logos on the body announce that this X5 has been endowed with the new 4.4-liter “M TwinPower Turbo” V8 engine—a monster so special that it gets its own name. But laugh at your peril, because it serves up 555 horsepower and 500 pound-feet of torque—and like the slingshot that sends fighter planes off the deck of an aircraft carrier, it can catapult the 5,368-pound X5 M to 60 miles per hour in a very un-SUV-like 4.5 seconds. Top speed, should you ever find yourself on a racetrack, is 155 miles per hour.

The engine suffers from a bit of turbo lag from a standing start (imagine if it didn’t: zero to 60 in three seconds!), but its prodigious power output makes up for any momentary hesitation. And at highway speeds, adding 10, 15, 20 miles per hour to pass slow-moving traffic is like nothing. In a blink of the eye you’re back in your lane, the traffic receding in your rearview mirror.

Let your dealer know that you’ll be back in a few months—around the time that the first flakes hit the ground—so you can swap the high-performance run-flat tires with some serious snow shoes. But until then, let all your roads be dry, your on-ramps be clear, and your expressways be uncongested. The X5 M delivers the type of performance—not just outrageous straight-line acceleration, but handling and braking—that calls out for long, brisk drives.

It’s not just the driver who gets treated well, either. The five-passenger cabin channels a comfortable and contemporary masculine charm. Outfitted in contrasting leather and metal trim (or wood, if you prefer), it is at peace with the BMW’s overall sense of luxury and solidity.

The ever-popular X5 comes standard with all-wheel-drive and a full assortment of safety and performance systems. In addition to the M version, the line-up includes models with a V6 engine, a normally aspirated V8, and a V6 diesel.

So is the X5 M’s power and performance—wrapped in a package that makes it look quite similar to its lesser relatives—really worth it?

At a starting price of $85,500, the X5 M costs about $38,000 more than an un-optioned V6-powered X5. Granted, the X5 M has 295 more horsepower than that entry-level model. And it comes standard with cachet that you just don’t get with a run-of-the-mill model. But still. If you settle for the admittedly slower V6 model (which can hit 60 in a respectable-for-an-SUV 7.8 seconds), you can buy a delightful little BMW 135i coupe. With some change.

Still lusting for the X5 M? Hard to blame you. Even when the head says no, the heart wants what the heart wants.

Be sure to let your heart have some fun with the option list, too. While the X5 M comes well equipped, a few upgrades never hurt. Your best bets are a $1,800 package that bundles a heads-up display and a rear-view camera, and a cold-weather package (heated rear seats to match the standard front warmers, heated steering wheel, and a ski bag) for just $600 more.

Naperville BMW Dealer
Bill Jacobs BMW/MINI
1564 W. Ogden Avenue
888.619.3719
www.billjacobsbmw.com